spEciaL eNtry ^.^

heyhey..suddenly got the urge to blog a "thanksgiving" list. Think gona b very lengthy. cuz too many ppl to thank ler. =)

first on the list..iz ..yarh.. haha..my dear..the one i loved. hmm. Thanks for the good memories. Thanks for changing me. Thanks for changing for me. hmm. well. thanks for loving me once. haha. well. thanks for everyting. U leaving me iz the worst xmas gift i eva gotten. But. I learnt to b tougher. I learnt to b more independent eva. I learnt alotalot. though dey were all in a hard wae. Sadly to sae. I still haven gotten over u. haha. itz so damn hard. =( well. at least we happie tgr once. thanks. it meant alot to me. =) i sincerely wish u n her to b happie tgr..n mae ur relationship last..=)

next. mY bestest fren raine the chiobu..haha.. nt exaggerating lorh. this gurl iz reali pretty..most guys' ideal girL. haha. i can swear on that. well. gona thank you wor. thanks for knocking sense into me wif ur chiminology on love n relationships during my darkest times. thanks for your 'counsellings'. Seriously, you do make a good counsellor. haha. thanks for lending a listening ear wheneva i feel down. i always feel so much beta after toking to you w/o fail wor. =) hmm. u oso taught me sth. haha. ur devotion towards benny. haha. no kidding. i can still rmb clearly what u did for him. reali. it wus very noble of u. though alot of ppl disagree. i dun care. i still tink you two are the best compatible couple ard. hee. =Pp truly. well. thanks alot for everyting my dear gurl. hope to see you when u cum back to singapore. =)

uP next. eriC ng..haha.. the most blur-ish guy i eva seen. he oso my best best fren wor. Always ther for me wif a listening ear. haha. Can always pour my sorrows, complaints, n craps to him de. He nv did seem to mind. haha. well. always blurblur de. haha. tink is by nature bahx. well. Thanks pal. hmm. oh yar. you hor. although on the surface lyke treat relationships very lightly, but i can still see tt you reali do care for the one u loved. haha. forgive me for always lecturing you on tt lah. Cant help it lah. I m a gurL too mahx. well. xie xie ni..=)

hmm..then followed by..matthew..haha..another of my goody fren. a caucasian whu speaks fluent chinese. Amazed? haha hmm. heard tt u already got a fan club in acjc ler wor? haha. so popular wor. haha. hmm.gona thank you for ur preachings. haha. i learnt alot from you too. haha. we went thru quite alot tgr rite? haha. hmm. well. i will always bear ur words in mind de. they kip me going n motivated. thanks i will always try to stay happie de. =) haha. hmm. actuali, i tink u din realise it. i knew u since sec one. haha. in drama n in choir. when mingxuan wus still ard. haha. everyting seem to happen so quickly..well..he wus a great fren to me too..=) well..matt. hope we will b frenz foreva..=) take lotsa care. thanks alot wor. =)

weiyang aka FRANCIS..another of the guailan gang de. haha. duno why he recently becum so religious. haha. matt's influence? haha..well maeb itz quite gd this way too. =) hmm. this guy. always so rebellious. but he reali very jiang yi qi de. take real gd care of me. haha. he made me cry two times. haha. i tink u quite scared of me ler hor? haha. i too emotional ler lah.=P dui bu qi.. haha..well..this guy taught me tt frenships last longer than aneting.. n tt love at our age now is merely nth.. haha..dun see him always so rude n violent.. sumtimes he reali philosophical de lorh.. at least tt gd side of him wus shown to me =) thanks weiyang..u are always my bestest sista ard..=) *winkx*

oH yar! most imptly!! the LamsOon gAng..consisting of francis kang weiyang, matt*ma tai*, jiesheng*forgot wat u all call him ler*, Josiah*sia zai*, jiayong *da tou*...reali gona thank you guys for making my 16th bdae a memorable n happie one =) i noe you guys took alot of trouble to get those gifts for me. thanks. if i m nt wrong, u all sacrificed ur lamsoon time abit isit? haha. thanks thanks. haha. =) you guys rockx man ^.^ continue to strive on wif the lamsooN spirit. =)

i tink ttz quite alot ler hor? dun wana b so naggy. haha. nxt time then continue more.. haha.. bleah.. i reali gt alot fo ppl to thank de..=) hmm..if nt for these gd frenz, i wldnt b ME. haha. itz that serious wor. well....juz wana sae.. THANK YOU to all my great, angelic frenz whu were ther for me always.=) love ya pplZ..*wink* haha. *muackx*

310105

todae wus a boring dae. Haha. Which schdae isnt? Haha. Well. todae i wus damn sick. Wus sick since ysd. But too stubborn lah me. haha. still went sch. haha. well. felt lyke fainting thruout the whole dae. Sian. Todae went to check the tryouts results. Haha. Badminton n odac both dun wan me. Hmmph. fine lorh. Nvm. i stil gt choir. haha. =P

after cheena lessons. me, evon, fiona went lot1. haha. gt a big surprise. haha. i saw CAi hong. my beloved chinese teacher. Gosh. we were all so excited. think ppl whu were ard us gt reali pissed off becuz of our screamings. haha. Just as expected. Cai hong wus shocked to noe tt i m taking CHINESE A. haha. my cheena is reali tt BAD. haha. i dun deny the truth de. well then. saw KANGYU. wah liew. he growing taller n taller. now already 187 liao. i look up at him still nidda strain my neck leh. liew. hai wo feel so inferior. =P well. we chatted for very long. haha. so fun. reali miss alot alot of ppl manz. hee. hope to see u guys sOon..=)

i m bAck ^^

Geez. I am finali back home. HOme sweet home. haha. Hmm. Din blog much for this week. Let me recall...First n foremost, i din go for the student council interview eventually. haha. not back out horx! haha. I actuali wanted to join O2 *the student council* juz to b an ogl bah ler. haha. but then again. i most prob wun b even staying on. haha. hmm. ya..tt wus on erm wednesdae.

then came thurs. I went for badminton tryout. Haha. It wasnt as tough as i tot. haha. but then. I wus initially scared haha.cuz of the pros playing very skillfully mahx. hmm. ya.

Then came fri. haha. actuali i wus supposed to end lessons at 3.30 pm de. But i sneaked out at 12.30 n went hm to rest n grab my stuffs for choir orientation. Went back sch ard 4 n went for ODAC*outdoor activity club* tryout. Itz wus pretty fun n exciting. Had a pleasant icebreaker session. haha. Played "elope". me n my partner very pro. ttz sth i m proud of. we kip kena sabo. but end up we din get forfeited cuz we sprinted very well tgr. haha. then. we had to play a telematch. wah kao. gt sth lyke the napfa five stations lidat. nidda do chinups. o.O haha. lucky mypartner quite fit. he sae no prob. haha. i din force himhorx. haha. oH yar! he lied to me lorh. cuz nidda sprint 400m mahx. then i asked him whether he can run well ornt. he told me he sux. then when itz our turn. wah liew he sprinting lyke hell lorh. i wus practically being dragged along. nearly died. haha. but nt too bad. lucky i can run. haha. then he proceeded to do chinups. situps.climb the wall. then. i wus blindfolded n he dragged me again n sprinted another 400m. Being blind sux lorh. me very kelian. nearly tripped. If nt for mypartner whu wus holding my hand tightly i wld haf fallen flat. haha. the games were pretty gross. then gt interview. haha. i ACTUALI chatted wif the interviewer wor. so nt my style. haha. =P after odac tryout, i wus pretty drained. but stil alive. haha.

then i went for choir orientation LATE. haha. they were having dinner liao lorh. haha. yarh. met the J2s. Gt a few decent-looking ones lah. hmm. ppl lyke shawn. but too bad. he alreadi ming hua you zhu liao. itz so obvious lorh. he n jaz. thruout the whole ting. kip protecting her. tsktsktsk=X the choir VP david. is a fun-loving guy. very nice lah. took real gd care of us. to the extent tt he watch ova us thruout the nite n nt slping. so noble wor. haha. hmm.during the nite we played alot of games lorh.. too bad no haf nite walk. sad. but it wus damn fun as my grp wus a bunch of enthu n fun ppL. haha. hmm. well. then we had ghost stories sharing session. david's idiot idea. hai wo dun dare go toilet alone. PURPOSELY ONE ARH? hmm. then ard midnite we had movie screenings. watched "a walk to rmb", "dodgeball", then finali "dirty dancing" haha. watched till ard 4+ am then everyone is finali aslp haha. i fell aslp during dodgeball cuz i wus too drained liao mahx. CAnt blame me. I had all the physical stuffs all in one dae. CAn die leh. wah liew. then hor the air con damn cold lorh. i wus shivering lyke hell. then i tink itz david whu saw me lidat. haha. then he went to increase the temp. n lend me slping bag. wootz. thanks alot man. reali very gan dong. *sobx* so touched. Geez.

hmm. then morn gt play couple games. haha. shawn n jaz. wah liew. stuck tgr lyke superglue lidat. haha. think they enjoyed it most. hee. play captain ball. my god. seemzlyke dodgeball style lorh. so many injuries. haiyo. so violent lorh. then went play wet games. stupid shawn. wat stupid rule lorh. can blast him wif water bomb. hai wo kena kick out. hmmph. jaz!! ur hubby bully me!! =p the sun damn hot lorh. i kena sun burnt again lorh. haish. getting darker le. dennis i breaking ur record ler.. wootz.. hey muz mit up one dae..dun always b bz wif ur gals.. i m very impt too!!haha..bu yao lian..no lah..reali long time nv see u ler lorh..find time for me k? =)

hmm. then lunch wus yummielicious. haha. yum yum. i tink i wus a little too harsh to david.Opps. i wus reali juz kidding de. reali. i swear. DUn angry wid me hao mah?=( duibuqiduibuqi...hmm..then continue playing captain ball. same ting dodgeball style. more casualties. haha. i wusnt one of them. hee. i oni gt alot of bruises. cuz alot of ppl kip banging into me. wad da. esp tt david. i noe i nt within ur eye level lah. no nid lidat de dui mah? hmmph. hmm. then after bathing. went watch white chicks. haha. wootz. so nice. i duno watch hw many times ler. haha. hmm. well. then shawn looking for trouble lorh. kip pausing to giv announcements. haha. well. then when the orientation ends, everyone helped to arrange back the chairs lorh. then idiot lah. i wus aching all ova due to ysd odac tryout. then had trouble moving the chairs. then david stood ther stared at me lyke i m an alien lidat. N stil asked " y so dead? very light oni mah" arrgh. lucky he gt help me move the chairs after tt. else he reali wld haf gotten a bashing frm me de. haha.

choir pract start nxt thur n sat. whoa. i m looking forward to it man. though they stil dun haf the quality yet. but i juz luv the spirit lorh. everyone juz luv to sing. n is so enthu. coOl. so unlyke bp choir. go ther will feel tt i haf grown older each time.=( haiyo. well. all the results of the tryouts will b out on mon. c lah. if badminton wans me. i dun mind. odac. hmm. stll considering. haha. choir rox. =P

oh yar. my present klas gt klass outing seh nxt sat. dun reali tink will b a success. haha. hmm. i juz hate the rV ppl in my klass. except sophia. they juz sux lorh. act so arrogant lidat. one fine dae i gona smack them man. if they are so clever they wun b ending up in pj liao. IDIOTS!! arrgh.

vdae iz cuming ler. wootz so fast. raine arh..u gd wor. lucky u now in england. else...u noe.. i will..ermhmm..BENNY...=X oops. i din sae aneting wor..=P haha..well..take care ppl..~ tata

~learn to cherish every moment of ur life~

tiring seh..jc life sux..

I m so so so tired lorh. Haish. Tak boleh tahan liao. Jc life reali v tiring. Now oni hafing the lectures n tutorials lorh. N i m already lyke so drained! haish. Cant imagine wad will happen when the ccas start lorh. Oh yar! I got thru the audition. Haha. Went to check the noticeboard todae mahx. Saw shaowei n edi's name. Haha. i wus screaming lyke hell i noe. Happie mahx. Heyhey dun get the wrong idea. I m NOT interested in shaowei. Though i am alwaes lyke sae him my IDOL..haha..ppL talented mahx. I wus juz kidding de mahx. Dun anehw spread. haha. He iz juz nt my type. Though he iz so talented n quite gd looking. Haha.

Oh yar. Todae had sum kinda "interaction" wif our direct seniors. Wah seh. Disappointing lorh. No shuaiges at all. Haish. Saddening lorh. Nearly go 'crash' other klasses.=( Hah. Then hor. Thruout the "interaction" tingy, I wus flipping thru polys stuffs. Kinda made up my mind nt to stay in Jc liao. haha. Duno why. I m juz so tired of studying so hard. No longer motivated as before. Haish.

Alright. My dae sux. T gt the interview for student council. Duno why so many ppl so scared for wat. Juz an interview oni wat. Wadz so big deal? haha. I heck care lah. Iz either they wan me or they dun wan me oni wat. As simple as tt. Haha. Whu cares? Wish me gd luck. haha. =)

~i am learning to let go...~

240105

Juz finished pia-ing two maths C tutorials. Boring. Finished within 1.5 hrs. Haha. I m going back to being a nerd again. I am amazed at myself too. o.O" Hee. Perhaps. I am just trying to force myself to forget everyting bahx. Right now, I dun feel lyke tinking abt aneting liao. I juz wana live my life to the fullest. Not much time left. My op iz cuming ler. If it doesnt go well, haiz. I duno lah. I am nt very optimistic abt this. Haiz.

Dun tok abt saddening tings liao. i must cheer up.

Oh yar! todae met jason at the mrt platform. Haha. I gave him a scare. Cuz he wus so engrossed in msging duno whu lorh. So funnie his expression. Nearly burst out luffing. =P Hmm. Duno why. I kinda miss everyone lorh. Now. See those whom i long time no see de. I will be so damn happie lorh. Hee. Abit sot lorh. ~lalala. I wana organise klass outing leh. haha. DJ!! ORGANISE QUICK! Haha. Else i organise go ESCAPE hor..=P By then YOU BETA TURN UP!! NO WAE OUT LIAO=P

One more thing! Todae i went sch psycho everyone. Haha. Hey bpians! Letz go back bp on cheena new year! Letz break the stupid rules! To hell wif the stupid banning! I am going to bP to do the Bp cheer WITH THE BANGING OF TABLES! N the BANANA DANCE. Letz teach the sec ones n twos..To hell wif HELMET HITLER =P Letz make sure that she has a heart attack n die! haha. i am so Mean. *bleah* Cant help it. Haf been too guai for the past few years. Cant blame me lorh. =P haha. Duno why i so crappy oso.

Hmm..I juz wana b myself. N try to find the old me back. =)

220105

long long time nv blog ler. Sian. Alot of tings haf happened. Been very depressed n stuffs. Bz trying to get over everyting. Trying to get back up on my feet. Doing these all alone iz damn hard. Haiz. Why shld i be crying bcuz of sumone heartlessness? There is no need ler. I learnt my lesson. The hard wae. I dun eva regret noe-ing u. Juz regret losing you. Ended up wif ur heartlessness. Nothing matters now, i guess. i am stil trying to find the old me. The old jiaxin whu iz cheery all dae no matter wat happens. The old me whu enjoys being ard wif ppl n hafing fun. Indeed, the present me sux. Antisocial. Hostile. Pessimistic. Dull. Plain. Sulky. And all. I dun lyke it one bit. I am still in search of the old me. The old me that has been lost after losing you. haish.

Well. Watever it iz. I hafta look forward to my future rite? hmm. Well. Shallnt dwell on those stupid n meaningless stuffs liao.

Hmm. Today change my style of dressing. Wore skirt. Haha. Ray saw me. o.O Gave me this look. Haiz. I noe i normally very tom-boyish lah. A few others oso lidat. *shrugs* Gave sum face lah! Nan de i so Girlish lorh. Haha. Went ngee ann. Alone. Cldnt find aneone. Haha. Pathetic. Nearly got lost. Hmm. I stil very confused wat course to take. Hah. Sian. On the wae out. Saw gracie n meifeng. Then went walk more. Haha. Crazy. Then went mac. Eat till i bloated lah. Growing fatter liao. Die. haiz. hmm. Then pei gwacie to cityhall. I miss working man. Studying is so boring. So stressful. So no life. Working is so much more fun. More lively.

Haiz. I miss Bpians. N bp tOo. Xcept for BUTTERCUp ttz. She is causing the downfall of bP lorh. Stupid school rules. Duno what the hell she is tinking. She sux man. Arrgh! Ban the traditional banana dance. Arrgh! Muz b becuz she duno how to shake lah. Inferior feelings. What is worse? She banned the banging of tables while doing the bP cheers? Arrgh. Sucky lah. No banging on tables then wat? Use head bang on wall meh? Duno wad she tinking lorh. Our heads not as hard as her IRONHELMET lorh. Stupid. Got brain oso dun wan use. Wait. Hold on. Does she even gt a brain? One dae, I gona go back bP n protest. Haf a strike. Get that buttercup off her seat. SHe doesnt even deserve that postition. To hell wif her man.

Okay. I m getting over agitated liao. Sian. No mood to blog liao. Stupid buttercup. Me go rest now. Buaiz. Tata.